so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
dude i'm inner monologue high
you mean i was at the winter classic?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
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