No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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