I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Houston, we have a squirter
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
that is very illegal...i love you.
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