Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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