What tipped you off? The sombrero?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Randomize
