I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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