You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
