when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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