Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize
