Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize