please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
