Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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