My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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