Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Randomize