Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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