What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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