I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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