just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Are we still banned from the library?
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
