We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
