At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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