jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize