so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
