ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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