very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
