Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
