ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
