New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Randomize
