It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
