We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
