But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
