It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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