Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
