I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize