oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
