guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
