I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
