i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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