Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize