last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Randomize
