Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
