Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
i dont even know how to be here
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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