Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
it's not cheating when I paid for it
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
