I don't usually arrange sex via text message
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
