Rock
Scissors
Fuck
hell yes lets make some ravioli
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
