her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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