is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize
