Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
