On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
