I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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