You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I AM VODKA MAN
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
