Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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